One hand holds a pencil — a slender, hexagonal length, sheathed in bright yellow paint; the other grips a sharpener — small, silver rectangle, the blade within angled inward over its hollow belly. Insert pencil into sharpener. Apply gentle pressure. Crank the wrist and twist repeatedly. Curls of yellow-edged wood peel away from the blade. Dust of graphite falls. Withdraw pencil. Touch sharpened tip. Though it pricks the index finger — indeed, leaves a gray dot smudged upon the whorled fingerprint — the point itself wiggles, falls away. Broken. Reinsert pencil. Twist and turn. Watch carefully as the graphite core is slowly exposed from beneath splintered cowl of wood. Observe as the tip breaks while sharpening. Withdraw pencil. Tap out sharpener to remove wood, and dust, and graphite tip lodged within the channel beneath that bright, slender blade. Reinsert pencil. Twist and turn. Extract pencil from sharpener. Touch tip. Sigh as point falls away. Repeat. Over. And over. And over…
“Break & Repeat” — C.Birde, 8/16
Nightjars & Damselflies 
So, what does the book say about this one?
Sounds like a universal message to try a different method to get something done or give it up. The ol’ Sisyphus analogy. You can keep pushing the boulder the same ol’ way or try something else.
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This dream is a direct result of a chronic injury to my dominant hand, which limits daily activity and my ability to write, draw, play music, communicate. It is dream of frustration and gloom.
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…a study in futility and fatigue. In the middle of the piece is “watch carefully” and that is one of many things that you do well, as shown in the vivid details here.
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It seems, sometimes, that even careful observation has little effect on outcome. I guess there are moments when we must just “arrive” and then manage the consequences…
(And thank you! 🙂 )
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